from A Moral Alphabet
D: The Dreadful Dinotherium he   
 Will have to do his best for D.   
 The early world observed with awe   
 His back, indented like a saw.
 His look was gay, his voice was strong;   
 His tail was neither short nor long;   
 His trunk, or elongated nose,
 Was not so large as some suppose;   
 His teeth, as all the world allows,   
 Were graminivorous, like a cow's.
 He therefore should have wished to pass   
 Long peaceful nights upon the Grass,   
 But being mad the brute preferred
 To roost in branches, like a bird.1
 A creature heavier than a whale,   
 You see at once, could hardly fail
 To suffer badly when he slid
 And tumbled (as he always did).
 His fossil, therefore, comes to light
 All broken up: and serve him right.
 MORAL
 If you were born to walk the ground,
 Remain there; do not fool around.
 E stands for Egg.   
 MORAL
 The Moral of this verse 
 Is applicable to the Young. Be terse.
 K for the Klondyke, a Country of Gold,   
 Where the winters are often excessively cold;
 Where the lawn every morning is covered with rime,   
 And skating continues for years at a time.   
 Do you think that a Climate can conquer the grit   
 Of the Sons of the West? Not a bit! Not a bit!   
 When the weather looks nippy, the bold Pioneers   
 Put on two pairs of Stockings and cover their ears,   
 And roam through the drear Hyperborean dales   
 With a vast apparatus of Buckets and Pails;   
 Or wander through wild Hyperborean glades
 With Hoes, Hammers, Pickaxes, Mattocks and Spades.   
 There are some who give rise to exuberant mirth   
 By turning up nothing but bushels of earth,   
 While those who have little cause excellent fun   
 By attempting to pilfer from those who have none.   
 At times the reward they will get for their pains   
 Is to strike very tempting auriferous veins;   
 Or, a shaft being sunk for some miles in the ground,   
 Not infrequently nuggets of value are found.   
 They bring us the gold when their labours are ended,   
 And we—after thanking them prettily—spend it.
 MORAL
 Just you work for Humanity, never you mind   
 If Humanity seems to have left you behind. 
 Notes: 
1We have good reason to suppose
He did so, from his claw-like toes
Copyright Credit: n/a
Source: Complete Verse (1970)


